ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
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I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
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There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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