Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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