that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
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Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
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I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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