...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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