Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
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