As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
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he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
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Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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