2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
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