just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
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I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
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she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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