Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize