so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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