his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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