Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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