He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I just forgot I was standing up.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize