you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize