My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize