How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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