WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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