i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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