this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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