I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
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