Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I need a beard to bite.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
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