i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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