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We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
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