just come out here and I will go home with you...
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
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I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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