glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
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It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
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Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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