Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
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i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
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I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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