are you still at the devil's house?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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