Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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