I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize