I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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