I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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