kristin has been a bad kristin
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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