apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
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she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
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I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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