the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
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I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
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He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
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