actually, I'm a sock model
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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