Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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