Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
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I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
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We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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