My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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