I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
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