My liver just broke up with me...
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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