Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize