sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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