I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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