if i died would you start the facebook group?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
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You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
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