He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize