I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize