i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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