Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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