she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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