Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize